"SCARY STORIES TO TELL IN THE DARK, AND THE PROBLEM WITH PG-13 HORROR"

So this weekend I managed to get out of my cave and get to a movie theater to see the much anticipated (by me anyway) “Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark”, the movie based off the book series that I constantly picked up during my elementary school years due to A, I love creepy pictures and stories and B, I was usually too lazy to read chapter books for a good portion of my elementary school years and these stories were short enough to hold my attention. When the super bowl trailer for this movie premiered I lost my shit. A movie based on my childhood favorite book series? Being produce by Guillermo Del Fuckin’ Toro?! there’s no way this could possibly disappoint, my mind started thinking of all of the amazing stories that could be told through this movie and the amazing and gory creature design that must be a part of this film. I mean have you SEEN the art in this series!?

However, the moment the I saw the new trailer my heart sank. PG-13… I love scary movies and I love to see them succeeding so much in recent years but the way studios seem to love forcing a lower rating in order to allow a younger audience to see the films and make more money. But why though? IT Chapter 1 had an R rating and made 700 MILLION in the box office. You would think with such promising outlooks for movies with a built in audience (I’m pretty sure every elementary school child has at the VERY LEAST seen these books) that go pedal to the metal in terms of violence and adult themes would make the studios less hesitant to go all in and just forget about the ratings.

While I do plan on releasing a fully fledged review soon for “Scary Stories” I will say that this movie would have GREATLY benefited from an R rating the only monster that was really kinda scary was the monster from the story “ME TIE DOUGH-TY WALKER!” and while many of the other monsters were at the very least creepy, a bit more gore and maybe some of the very ‘drippy’ stylings of the art in the books would have really raised this movie to another level.

While I do often times enjoy many of these big budget PG13 horror movies, they rarely seem to dredge up the same uneasy, stressful, and scary feelings that many of these movies R rated big brothers can bring. If I had any advice for big studio execs I’d say go HAM and don’t worry about the younger audiences being able to see the movie as they’ll probably end up watching it one way or another anyways if they hear from their older peers that the movie is good.

Published on Wednesday, the 14th of August, 2019

MY HORROR ORIGINS

The year was 2007, I was 11 years old at the time and Autumn had begun. My dad took me to the local Best Buy and I was having a look at the DVDs they had in stock as Best Buy always seemed to have the most interesting selection. I then came along this beauty.

At the time I had no real interest in Horror films for the most part, I was always more of an occasional comedy movie and video games kid until that point. But there was something about this box set that drew me in. Maybe it was the raised case with a creepy grim reaper skeleton on the front, maybe it was that little speaker box on the top that would play thunderstorm sound effects along with an eerie tune. Honestly I’m not entirely sure what pubescent mixture of hormones and chemicals running wildly in my body drove me to wanting that box set but before I knew it I had it with me at my house and I was ready to watch some “HORROR MOVIE CLASSICS”.

Over the coming weeks I had watched all of the movies in the set but out of all of those I really enjoyed three of them and only one of them has been consistently re-watched over and over again until it’s been almost burned into memory over the years, and that movie is “Night Of The Living Dead” (to be referred to as “Night” from here-out)

At the time I was watching these movies I figured at the very least that black and white films couldn’t be scary, Night was the first instance of a movie to prove me wrong. The long drawn out opening credits showing the Pontiac driving through a rural area and into a graveyard. Being that this was a black in white movie (That I thought was made in the 40s at the time) I assumed this movie would have more set up to the plot. Whenever Barbara was first attacked by a zombie it struck me as a surprise. “You mean this isn’t like an episode of Goosebumps when the first scare was always fake?” The film felt so dark and grim and the ending always had me so depressed but the way it was shot in a documentary style almost made me question if the movie where based off something that had happened as I’d never seen a movie handle the ending in such a way. “Night” wasn’t just scary, it was depressing, gory(that body they find in the house still haunts me to this day), and even a bit heartwarming with the way many of the survivors put aside their differences to fight an unknown terror, and I loved it.

“Night” is the movie that had me seeking out the scariest things I could find to watch while I was at my dads (who was quite a bit more lenient on the movies I could watch) house. I remember watching “Jaws” for the first time and being blown away with SFX and had me just thinking ‘how did they even manage to make that movie.’ I remember watching “Return Of The Living Dead” and thinking ‘man, that was a very different movie from the first.’ I even remember borrowing all of the “Nightmare On Elm Street” movies from my uncle and burning through all of them up until Freddy Vs. Jason as fast as I could.

Horror is the genre that really made me think of films as art. I had never had much of an interest in film beforehand, as it just seemed like a waste of time to me. With horror films, however, I can watch some pretty terrible movies and still find enjoyment in them, and I think that’s one of the main things that makes horror special to me personally.

Published on Wednesday, the 10th of July, 2019

All articles herein have been written, edited, and published by Cory L. all material may be shared so long as credit is given :D